A band of brothers is not a club, self-help group, or recovery program. It is a group of men, growing in friendship, pursuing a common vision, sharing their victories and losses, wisdom and questions, values and interests with one another in a distinctly masculine way. A band of brothers cannot be reproduced and cannot be replaced by any other form of friendship or community. King David was a mighty warrior, but he wisely surrounded himself with other “mighty men” (see I Chronicles 11:10-47 and II Samuel 23:8-39) which consisted of about 30-40 warrior friends, with two smaller subsets of 3 elite soldiers he kept very close to him. From David, Paul and Jesus, we can see a pattern of great men choosing to forge a band of brothers around them. Here are reasons why men need a band of brothers:

1. Men need friends to share activities with. Men are typically kinetic, heuristic, and experiential in their learning and relationship building. In other words, they enjoy doing stuff with other men.
2. Men need friends to challenge each other. Men often have a competitive drive and desire to be pushed to do and be their best.
3. Men need friends to encourage one another. The root word for encourage is “encoragier” which means to "make strong, hearten." Men get more courage and heart by being around each other.
4. Men need friends to carry their burdens. A man will rarely unload his burdens on a child or a woman, but when he feels secure around a group of men, he can find strength through their support.
5. Men need friends to laugh with. Laughter is medicine to a man’s soul, and shared laughter with a group of men is a bonding and healing force unlike any other. Men who laugh together are better equipped to handle adversity.
6. Men need friends to be “on mission” with. Every man wants to be on a winning team, and have a mission he is pursuing alongside his teammates.
7. Men need friends who understand and have understanding. Manhood brings
   its own unique struggles, questions, and moments of confusion. Men need other men who both understand what they are facing, and have understanding, or wisdom, to help them navigate successfully.

Life is a team sport, and a group of championship level friends who understand what winning at home and at work looks like are vital to thriving in the relationships that matter most.  It is not selfish to invest in growing your friendships and becoming a better husband, father, and leader.  No one will take responsibility for the state of your friendships other than you, so be intentional and put in the investment necessary to forge deep friendships that will last.

Finding Your Band of Brothers: Forging Deep Friendships in a Shallow World is a new IMPACT Cohort study for men who want to grow as husbands, fathers, and leaders.  If you are a man who believes that forging deep friendships is important, we encourage you to join or start an IMPACT Cohort and participate in this 7 week study. Take action here.