After the death of King Solomon, his son Rehoboam ascended to the throne. Rehoboam went to Shechem, where all Israel had gathered to make him king. The people of Israel, led by Jeroboam, approached Rehoboam with a request. They asked him to lighten the harsh labor and heavy load his father Solomon had placed on them.

Rehoboam sought advice on how to respond. First, he consulted the elders who had served his father Solomon. They advised him to be a servant to the people and speak kindly to them, suggesting this would ensure their loyalty. However, Rehoboam rejected their advice and instead consulted the young men he had grown up with. They advised him to increase the burdens on the people, telling him to declare that his little finger was thicker than his father's waist and that he would add to their yoke. Rehoboam followed the advice of the young men, responding harshly to the people. This response led to a rebellion, and the 10 northern tribes of Israel rejected Rehoboam as king, making Jeroboam their leader instead. Rehoboam lost his leadership because he listened to foolish counselors.

No man sets out to lose his kingdom (family, career, reputation, etc). Every man wants to thrive and be successful, but not every man is willing to listen to those who have walked the path they are headed down. One of the key aspects of an IMPACT Players cohort is the multi-generational nature of most of the groups. Younger men need to learn from wiser mentors, and older men long to pass along some hard-learned wisdom. The next time you need to find wisdom, instead of simply listening to a podcast, reading a book, or watching a YouTube video, try asking a group of wise counselors.

Finally, consider the voices, or counselors you are listening to. Evaluate not only your friendships, but the radio stations and podcasts you listen to, the videos and movies you watch, and the books and blogs you read. Every voice is shaping your worldview, forming your character, determining your demeanor, and influencing your future. Winners walk with the wise, but failures fall with the foolish.

Finding Your Band of Brothers: Forging Deep Friendships in a Shallow World is a new IMPACT Cohort study for men who want to grow as husbands, fathers, and leaders. If you are a man who believes that forging deep friendships is important, we encourage you to join or start an IMPACT Cohort and participate in this 7 week study. Take action here.